It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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