it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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