That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
