Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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