Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
