glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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