I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
