there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
worst night to have a conscience
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize