I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
