the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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