Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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