He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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