"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize