I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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