Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
