why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
