What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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