Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
