I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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