i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I have grass duct taped all over my body
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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