Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
