Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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