You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm