I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
