Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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