Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
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