and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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