It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize