i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
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Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I smell like Dick and happiness
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I see more hoeing in ur future
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