i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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