so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
