i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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