Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.

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  (734): I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian. http://tfl.nu/giw2
  Replies (10) Good night (843) Bad night (1053)
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  (607): View more from New York

  just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.

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  (607): just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school. http://tfl.nu/1unl
  Replies (20) Good night (4432) Bad night (769)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.

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  (804): Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3. http://tfl.nu/mf94
  Replies (16) Good night (5902) Bad night (1225)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.

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  (250): By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right. http://tfl.nu/wypb
  Replies (12) Good night (3612) Bad night (1002)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even

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  (317): Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night... (317): Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even http://tfl.nu/pe86
  Replies (7) Good night (2745) Bad night (683)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.

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  (618): You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel. http://tfl.nu/6eyp
  Replies (4) Good night (2225) Bad night (830)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.

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  (201): A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns. http://tfl.nu/v0at
  Replies (5) Good night (1325) Bad night (433)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.

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  (919): It feels like one of my ribs evaporated. http://tfl.nu/v71y
  Replies (2) Good night (455) Bad night (826)
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  (567): View more from Ohio

  Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good

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  (567): Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good http://tfl.nu/gp9h
  Replies (2) Good night (731) Bad night (882)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.

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  (404): I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points. http://tfl.nu/5q8o
  Replies (10) Good night (1118) Bad night (782)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.

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  (860): He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/3zeb
  Replies (3) Good night (1200) Bad night (343)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home

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  (407): we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home http://tfl.nu/hueq
  Replies (4) Good night (444) Bad night (305)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Pencil dick carries the name proudly.

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  (612): Pencil dick carries the name proudly. http://tfl.nu/iir6
  Replies (5) Good night (205) Bad night (523)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with

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  (609): this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with http://tfl.nu/msu7
  Replies (0) Good night (351) Bad night (420)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit

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  (610): He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit http://tfl.nu/33or
  Replies (0) Good night (652) Bad night (241)

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