singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Damn victory sex feels great
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
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