is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize