The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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