He disabled his match.com account in front of me
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Randomize
