Having a random hookup so left but love u
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
