I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
