Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
