I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize