Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I did not marry a roomba.
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