I heard we made out
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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