Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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