I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
