I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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