I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
