actually, I'm a sock model
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize