I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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