um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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